Friday, November 16, 2007

President Colbert, Welcome!

Stephen Colbert, the popular comic and host of Comedy Central's The Colbert Butter Butter Report announced his one-half serious purpose to go a campaigner for the Presidential elections of 2008. He filed in North Carolina, his native state and, amid the jocular remarks by an amused public and a lingua in cheek media, in the end had to withdraw.

But, what if he had been elected president of the United states?

President Colbert, Welcome!

Jan 2009 - It was warm this morning time when Sir Leslie Stephen Colbert Butter Butter was sworn in as the 44th President of the United States of America. The stairway of the Memorial were full of guests, as expected, and from a distance they appeared like a teeming mass as the 500 servers specially hired for the event, were busy serving hot chocolate, donuts, hot domestic dogs and an occasional Gin and Vodka to everyone in sight including guards, tourers and uniformed soldiers.

It had been an unbelievable ocean trip for the newly elected president and also for a state eager to set an end to a bad episode in its history. Few modern times in the history of our state people had rejoiced in such as intense manner, not upon electing a new president but having the departing one leave of absence the working capital the nighttime before. The corporate suspiration from 300 million Americans and about 5 billion world abroad, heard some years before when the election consequences were announced , National Aeronautics and Space Administration claimed, was felt in the full solar system and caused aeroplanes in flight to rectify their flight features as the turbulency caused by the suspiration resembled a monumental burp.

President Colbert Butter cut the ceremonial short. There was no luxuriant address by the new resident of the White Person House. A single phrase defined the reaching of a new epoch in political relation in our country. "Those who voted for me can have got another hot dog, same as those who didn't!" In that short phrase President Colbert Butter Butter had distilled an entirely new set of rules and a philosophical outlook; new and radical societal and political mentalities were born at that very moment.

Stephen Colbert had never ceased to astonish me and many others. Days before the startup I asked him about his political platform, his vision of the state and the major political and societal inquiries that demanded contiguous attention. You see, during his political campaign he had not devoted any clip to speak about what he planned to do; instead, he concentrated strangely on the Fundamental Law which he blamed for every thing incorrect in the country.

Not once did he oppugn or impeach any of the other candidates, nor asked them directly about anything. Not once did he turn to the issues that kept the full state wondering about the current and the adjacent crisis. Best of all he had no venom toward anyone; it was just supreme indifference to the other aspirant pols, justified by his celebrated sentence "this is not a confessional festival and I make not care about the sinfulnesses of others; I am happy with mine!"

Only once he deplored the sad and tragical end of the 43rd presidency. Only once he made a remark about it: "This have been a simple lawsuit of an onion being served as a truffle!"
Jokingly he used to state that he would be happy to larn of one single positive and good enactment that could be traced to the former disposal and he would inquire Jesse James Roger Fry to compose a book about it.

With a hot domestic dog in his manus he entered the Ellipse Office for the first time. Helium agreed to present for the traditional exposure and allowed the mass media a time period of two minutes, at the end of which he asked everyone in the business office to leave, except me.

He looked around approvingly, took off his necktie and jacket and sat down in presence of the presidential desk. I could not assist saying:

"Steve, this is a rare and cherished moment. State something"

He smiled at me with that familiar glistening look and replied:

"Do you believe I could acquire another hot dog?"

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